


the misadventures of ryoken and his zombie boyfriend

by tasteslikeciel



Category: Yu-Gi-Oh! VRAINS
Genre: M/M, listen you can't yell at me if they're already dead, more tags to be added later, probably more pairings as well
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-11-01
Updated: 2018-11-01
Packaged: 2019-08-14 00:25:05
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,051
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16482578
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tasteslikeciel/pseuds/tasteslikeciel
Summary: Spooks make even spookier bedfellows, especially when your lover never learned how to tie a bandage properly and is constantly losing his head. Join Ryoken and his odd family of creatures (+1 human) as they make their way through this crazy thing we call (the after)life.





	the misadventures of ryoken and his zombie boyfriend

**Author's Note:**

> Happy Halloween, fellow spooks.
> 
> more to come cuz the au amused me enough to make it it's own thing

00\. Congrats! You’re dead!

When Ryoken wakes up, he feels like he’s awoken from a thousand year slumber. He’s sluggish, his mind is foggy, and he vaguely remembers being previously wet and cold and unable to breathe, like something sharp had pierced his lungs and dragged him down into a dark, watery abyss. Standing is an effort, thinking is a chore, and it takes a long time before he remembers what legs are used for, but once he manages to get himself going, he feels...well, not great because he has no idea where he is or even _why_ he is, but he feels okay, he supposes. Okay is better than not okay.

“Where am I?” he mutters to no one and he pauses, surprised, as he realizes he can speak. He has a voice and it echos a bit in the strange chamber he’s in. “...right. I can do that. I must have forgotten.”

How silly a thing to forget. He wonders why he ever did in the first place and then flexes his fingers and stretches, unable to hold back a yawn as he does so. It’s strange but he really doesn’t feel that bad. He can’t really feel anything wrong, but that in itself is a problem because he can’t feel anything at all. Although he stretched out his muscles, he couldn’t feel that natural pull and despite yawning, he felt no air enter his lungs.

He crosses his arms and his eyebrows knit.

That isn’t normal, is it? Or perhaps it is? His memory is really hazy. He can barely remember his own name much less what is and isn’t normal for a human being. He hums to himself and ponders over this. Then, he holds up his hands and inspects them. They’re a bit transparent, but otherwise seem okay.

“...hunh.”

Were they always transparent like this? Something eats at his mind, injects a feeling of wrongness into his chest. This...isn’t right, is it? His skin isn’t supposed to be such a translucent white. He’s so pale, like a ghost almost.

...

He shakes his head to himself and shrugs a little. It’s probably fine. He’s not in pain or anything so it’s probably nothing serious.

“Well, well, well~ Good morning, Sleeping Beauty.”

He jumps and stiffens as a hand lands on his shoulder. He whirls around, backing away a little as he sees another person suddenly standing behind him. The person’s hair is an ashy-blond color and he has a single blue eye peering up at him in amusement. The other eye seems to be completely covered up by a bandage stained a rusty red color. Other than that and his shining blue eye, everything else about him is ghostly pale.

“I was beginning to wonder if perhaps you had already passed on.” the man continues, smile curved mysteriously. “Yet here you are, awake at long last. I’d be lying if I said this didn’t please me to some degree~”

Ryoken blinks and gives the man a tiny frown.

“Who are you?”

The pale man’s eyes widen a bit in surprise (and is that a flash of hurt he sees in his eye?), but then comes a sigh and he holds a hand to his temple and shakes his head.

“You, too, hunh? Oh, Ryoken-sama, what am I to do with you?” he says wearily. He tuts and then his hands return to hiding behind his back. “I suppose I should start with the obvious. You might want to sit down for this, sir.”

It took him ages just to stand. He’s nothing sitting back down now.

“I’m fine where I’m at.”

The pale man raises an eyebrow at him but shrugs his shoulder after a moment.

“As you wish…” He then clears his throat and with no particular fanfare simply continues with: “You’re dead.”

The pale man says nothing more, likely allowing him the time to let this sink in. There’s a long silence afterward in which Ryoken’s brain tries to process what it heard, fails, and then tries it again. After the third fail, he gives up.

“I’m sorry, _what_?”

“You’re dead. Deceased. No longer living.” the pale man holds out a hand to the side, gesturing at nothing in particular and looking somewhat bored in the process, like he’s done this before. “Your heart and other organs have ceased to function and you-”

Ryoken holds up his hands to get him to stop. “I-I don’t need a dictionary definition of what it means. I’m asking you _what the fuck_?”

The pale man purses his lips. “Ryoken-sama, you may not remember it right now, but six years ago you drowned off the coast of Den City.”

Ryoken simply stares at him, eyes wide and disbelieving. Somehow, he doesn’t think the man is lying. Something about him sparks a sense of familiarity but he just can’t...what???

“None of us were able to get to you in time.” the pale man continues when Ryoken says nothing. He has the decency to look a little sympathetic now, at least. “Perhaps if you hadn’t hit your head, you could have reached the surface...but alas. No amount of CPR and praying brought you back.”

His smile returns and he looks a bit too satisfied about something.

“Although, perhaps the praying did work, in a way~”

“So I’m...I’m dead.” Ryoken repeats, trying desperately to wrap his mind around all this. He does remember being cold before waking up here… “I drowned? So where am I? Hell?”

“I believe some might refer to this as purgatory.” the pale man answers. “You know, with the whole unable to pass on thing and all. I’d say this is just another kind of life. It’s not much different from what we had before aside from the being dead part and exorcists can be a pain. But to be more specific, we’re at your father’s old cliff-side mansion. We live here now.”

Ryoken squints. “You’re amazingly calm about all this.”

The pale man shrugs. “I’ve had four years to get used to it. You will, too, in time. By the way, I should introduce myself again so the narrator can stop referring to me as ‘the pale man’. It’s getting a bit old.”

The pale man places a hand against his chest and takes a little bow. “Spectre, at your service~”

Ryoken stares for a moment, expression inching towards exasperation. “...is that a-”

“I swear it _is_ my name.” the one now dubbed a Spectre insists before Ryoken can finish. “Pure coincidence that I also happened to manifest as a spectral being.”

“Uh hunh.”

Spectre pouts just a little. “Let’s get you changed before we continue down memory lane. Your clothes are stained.”

Ryoken really doesn’t see the need. If he truly is dead, then what did his clothes matter?

Ryoken huffs. “Sure. Why not…”

 

01: Head Over Heels (and Other Body Parts)

A lot of time has passed since Ryoken first woke up in his father’s old mansion, all dead and spooky. He’s gotten most of his memories back from when he was still living and a lot of things that confused him before now makes sense. He remembers Spectre, much to the other’s delight, and he remembers his old VR account he can no longer access along with all the now useless coding knowledge he taught himself during his short 18 years of life, but some things still elude him. He doesn’t quite remember why he fell into the ocean to begin with, for starters. Spectre apparently doesn’t know either. Ryoken vaguely remembers speaking to his father before a rush of numbing cold pulled him into a six-year rest, but that’s all.

According to Spectre, his father was so consumed by grief over his death that he worked himself to death trying to find a way to bring him back. And unlike him, his father did not remain behind as a spirit. So he can’t ask him about it.

“Mm...ah well.” he mumbles to himself, ghostly white burial robes gently catching along the light breeze. Spectre seems to think he looks better in them. Ryoken couldn’t care much about it, but he supposes he fits in more with them. “Death is a little boring, though, isn’t it?”

That’s another thing he can’t figure out. He doesn’t know what’s locking him to Earth. He doesn’t particularly want to leave, but feels more like it’s his duty to pass on regardless. Perhaps he feels unfulfilled due to dying so young? Hm. Who knows.

He sighs and walks further into the garden to find a space to sit amongst the flowers. Because it’s Spectre who mainly takes care of it, the garden is a lush little slice of paradise filled with everything from hollyhocks to daffodils to rose bushes to lilacs. He always was so very attracted to plant-life while alive. It doesn’t surprise Ryoken in the slightest to see that continue on into death.

“Maybe I should find a hobby, too.” he tells the flowers around him. “I’m not much for scaring humans, but that exorcist has been skulking around here a lot lately. Perhaps I should practice… Do you think there’s a self-help book for that?”

Talking to himself or inanimate objects is starting to become a vice and he sighs at himself just a little for it.

“Look at me, talking to plants. Isn’t there some other way to pass my time?”

As if the Heavens heard his quiet plea and agree that he needs more excitement in his life, a rustling sound from above catches his attention and he pauses and debates on whether to call out to the sound or get up and sneakily investigate it.

Then something fleshy falls like a rock straight into his lap and he stiffens, gaze slowly falling to his lap.

Green eyes framed by bubblegum pink and luscious blue hair blink up at him, seeming slightly frustrated at something above him. His mouth forms the smallest, barely perceptible pout his ever seen someone make.

“...hi.” the head says.

It takes Ryoken a moment for his brain to catch up, but once it does, his natural reaction, despite being very much dead himself, is to shriek and toss the head out of his lap. It flies up and plops to the ground with a sickening smack. The head’s reaction is only brief surprise before acceptance masks his face halfway through his fall.

“That’s fair, I guess.” the head concedes and then sighs.

Something about the way the head sighs pulls a string or three of Ryoken’s ghostly heart and if it’s possible for a ghost to look embarrassed, he does. He brushes some locks of hair behind his ear and stands from his place among the flowers. He straightens his robes, takes a breath to prepare himself for whatever is about to happen, and walks over to where the head landed.

“Sorry.” he offers and hesitates for a moment before leaning down to pick the head up. He hold it up so they’re mostly face-to-face. “You surprised me.”

The head’s skin is discolored but not rotten and aside from the slight dirt and the stitches wrapping around one side of his face (and the, you know, lack of a body), he looks like a normal human.

The head closes his eyes. “As I said, that’s fair.”

“Still, it was rude of me. I really am sorry.” Ryoken insists and hopes the sincerity is there. It’s been a long time since he’s spoken to anyone besides Spectre so his people skills are a bit rusty. “My name is Kogami Ryoken and I hope this isn’t rude, but where’s your body?”

The head is silent a moment as it studies Ryoken. Eventually, it hums.

“Fujiki.” he replies with. “Fujiki Yusaku.”

Before he can continue, a loud thud accompanied by the squishing and rustling of plant-life sounds from behind them. Ryoken is proud to say he’s only slightly startled this time.

“And that’s my body.” Yusaku finishes with.

Ryoken turns and sees a headless body sprawled on the ground. Dirty white bandages are loosely wrapped around its neck and it’s clothed in a dirty school uniform Ryoken vaguely remembers belongs to the city’s high school.

“...oh.” Ryoken forms a little ‘o’ with his mouth and then he nods. “Mm...”

“Would you...mind putting me back together?” Yusaku asks, hesitating only a moment. “I wouldn’t normally ask but…”

“Uh, sure. It’s no problem. I did throw you, after all.” Ryoken walks over to Yusaku’s body, pauses, and then offers Yusaku an apologetic look. “I’m going to set you down for just a moment.”

“Alright.”

Ryoken carefully sets Yusaku’s head down and after making sure it won’t suddenly roll over or be swallowed by the flowers, he approaches Yusaku’s body, grabs its shoulders, and pulls it up to its knees.

“There we go.” he holds his hands up and motions for the body to stay where it is. Then he realizes how pointless the action was and runs a hand down his face. “Just...stay there, okay?”

The body wobbles a bit, but otherwise doesn’t move. Ryoken quickly fetches Yusaku’s head and sets about re-attaching it to his body. It doesn’t just magically stay, but he quickly realizes the bandage is the key and carefully unwinds it from around Yusaku’s neck.

“Hold your head for a moment.”

“Okay.”

With Yusaku’s head held in place, Ryoken makes quick work of securing the bandage properly until it’s nice and snug and Yusaku’s head isn’t going anywhere. All those first-aid kit skills he learned while alive actually ended up coming in handy.

He gives the bandage one last knot and fluffs up the bow he made in the back. Then he sits back and watches as Yusaku inspects his wrappings.

“Impressive.” Yusaku comments. His discolored fingers brush against the bow and he tilts his head a little. “A bow?”

“I thought it would look nice on you.” Ryoken admits. “I remember mother doing that to me and I thought...well, your head should stay now.”

“Oh.” Yusaku lets his hands fall from his neck and his lips slip into a tiny smile. “Thank you.”

“You’re welcome.”

 

02: My New (boy)Friend is A Zombie!

“Hunh. Look at you making friends.” Spectre muses out loud. He seems both pleased by this development and a little leery. It’s hard to tell with him sometimes, though. “Well, the more the merrier, as they say. This mansion is dreadfully empty. We could use the extra company.”

“Oh…” Yusaku’s neutral expression pinches slightly and he looks a bit uncomfortable. “I shouldn’t stay…”

“Why not?” Ryoken asks. He tries not to sound too eager to make him stay, but he probably failed. Years of no other friends but Spectre will do that to you. “There’s no humans here so there’s no worry of biting anyone and we’re ghosts so you can’t hurt us.”

“Feel free to bite any humans you do see, though~” Spectre offers. Ryoken gives him a look. “What? Humans are trouble. Trespassers _should_ get bitten.”

Spectre crosses his arms and huffs. “ _Especially_ if they’re a slimy exorcist whose name starts with a ‘Blood’ and ends with a ‘Shepard’.”

For goodness sake, Yusaku isn’t a guard dog! He might be a flesh-eating zombie, but he’s still a person!

_“Spectre.”_

Yusaku chuckles a little despite his fears. “If you insist, then okay. I’ll stay. You have a lot of herbs here that are good for me anyway. If I stay here and eat those, I won’t crave any flesh anymore.”

Ryoken can’t help that smile that crosses his face and if he squishes up to Yusaku’s side a little more, no one mentions it.

“Sure. Help yourself.” Spectre says. He looks a bit proud. “It’s good to finally see those have a use and here I was considering abandoning growing them.”

He eyes Yusaku critically, however. “You need new clothes, though. A school uniform of all things...is there a zombie apocalypse happening that we don’t know about?”

That did bring up a good point. What exactly happened to Yusaku?

“Mm. You still haven’t told me what you were doing climbing the garden wall.” Ryoken adds curiously.

Yusaku shakes his head a little and pulls at his dirtied tie.

“I died in an accident eight years ago. I was sick and in the hospital a lot, but that day I was allowed to go to school. My family was happy about it...but a truck driver had a heart attack that same day and I stepped into his path.” he explains. He eyes his tie a little sadly before letting it fall from his fingers. “I was resurrected about a year ago by a necromancer. She was a strange person, but treated me kindly. Had a weird affinity towards dressing me up in uniforms. If anyone asked, I was her godson. The school uniform helped. I was happy with her, I guess.”

Ryoken watches him in concern. There’s a but in this story somewhere. His uniform is bloody, after all. “What happened?”

“I ate her.”

Ryoken blinks and Spectre whistles.

“You...ate her?”

Yusaku nods. He seems a little sad, but otherwise not too bothered.

“That’s why I can’t be around humans. Their smell-” Yusaku pauses and swallows, shifting on his feet a little. “You wouldn’t understand because you’re both spirits, but humans smell so, so _good_. I didn’t want to eat her. I really didn’t, but…”

Yusaku looks up at them.

“Is it bad I liked it?”

Maybe. Probably. Then again, he is a zombie...

Spectre shrugs and chuckles. “He’s a zombie. What did everyone think was going to happen? You can’t expect them to remain conciliate little pets forever, you know? What did she feed you anyway?”

Yusaku hums in thought. “Mm, just enough herbs to keep me from rotting, but mainly meat. Usually animal. She did feed intruders to me sometimes, though. She called it a special treat.”

“See that was her mistake. Should have kept you a vegetarian.”

Ryoken sighs, shoulders slumping. “Well, I’m sorry for your loss all the same. I can assure you that won’t happen here, though. There’s nothing to bite on us. We wouldn’t feel it anyway.”

“Good.” Yusaku says, expression brightening up a bit. “Thank you.”


End file.
